The Sound of Silence

Dear readers, please note that the following thoughts are just an attempt to explore a social trend that I observed and discussed with some of my friends. The opinions are based only on my personal exposure to such situations. Any sort of further insights / feedbacks are welcome.

Sometimes I wonder how the definitions of “easy” and “difficult” have changed over a period of time. Economies are growing, technologies are developing, societies are changing. Are all these changes for good? May be. May be not.

I perfectly respect those who prefer to dance and enjoy themselves in a disco where popular tunes are being played at a rather high volume. (No sarcasm intended here.) India is a free country and everyone has a right to enjoy themselves in a way they would like to.

But do any of you feel that many people now-a-days are taking advantage of this freedom way too much? As it is, in our amazingly secular country, we always find some or the other festivals to celebrate. That’s fine. It’s a matter of somebody’s choice. But then why force others to get affected by the noise pollution due to the fire crackers and loud music? Is India – rural and urban both – becoming a more and more loud country in general? May be a person wants to spend his evenings quietly in his house, minding his own business. But does he get to do that? Of course not. When there are such beautiful songs being played on a loudspeaker in a procession nearby, he should rather listen to those songs and cheer his boring self up, shouldn’t he?

There was a time when the technology was not so advanced. When I say “there was a time”, I don’t mean the 1970’s. As far as I remember, even when I was about 12-13 years old, various up-to-date electronic instruments of that time were not available so easily, definitely not so cheaply. Loudspeakers, parties were limited to a few occasions such as annual gatherings, Ganeshotsavs, Diwalis etc. So, those who preferred a quieter life also had a ball during these times, since it brought a good break in their routine. Otherwise they could live their life in their own way. Leading a simple life without too many such distractions around was easier. Getting all the things required for a big bash of a party was a little difficult.

Now, I believe, things have changed. Due to various developments, getting all the things required for a big celebration is far easier. At least, even if not easier, people will go out of their way to somehow arrange it. And so what if we don’t have enough money to arrange a D.J. for the festival? No worries. It is a festival/pooja/marriage after all and we have to enjoy it by dancing till late night on latest dance numbers. We will collect (rather pressurize the people to pay) extra money and make sure that the best possible sound system is available. It is our right by constitution to express our joy or our devotion to god. If anyone has an exam / has become too old / is sick: Sorry boss, none of our problem. You yourself should have taken care about that!!!

Another worrying fact about this, I believe, is the frequency at which all this is increasing day by day. However small the event may be, a celebration is becoming a must. If they organize it in a closed hall, fine, at least it doesn’t disturb others. But in reality, these dance parties / jam-sessions take place in absolutely any sort of available open space, thereby making such events even more “accessible” and “enjoyable” to others.

And all this makes life of the fellas like me a little more uncomfortable.

You may call me old fashioned, but I am one of those people who love long quiet evenings. I would like to take a stroll around, chat up with a few friends. I love tranquility (Little too much to expect in a city like Mumbai, I know, but still). I would like to watch some interesting film. I would like to enjoy a raga played by Pt. Hariprasad Chaurasiya on flute. I would rather quietly focus on my work rather than find an excuse to go out and party. By work, I don’t mean the sort of work we do to earn a living. By work, I mean something I am passionate about. Something I would do no matter what. But sadly, just when you have reached your home, somebody nearby starts performing some religious ritual, followed by yada yada yada… the usual stuff goes on. Such times I really “bless” them a lot!

When I think about this, it seems to me that various things (for e.g. different electronic instruments, communication media, availability of finance) which were more difficult to get about 10 years back are now becoming far easier to get. I think that the reason doesn’t lie only in the technology becoming cheaper and widely available. It also lies in the general social trend which is forcing people indirectly to engage into such events.

On the other hand, a thing such as having one’s quiet personal space, which should be (and which in fact was) such a plain simple thing to have, has become so damn difficult!

I think a key factor which influences the above is the economic prosperity and the change in the concept of freedom in our society in last few years. Because of the post-globalization growth in India, people are having more personal disposable income. This extra income is allowing them relatively more party-time. And I somehow feel that once people are getting the taste of such parties, they are starting to grab every opportunity for a party. When they see more and more people around them participating in the same, they get encouragement and start caring less and less whether they are disturbing anybody else while enjoying themselves.

On a very personal note, I think that all this may well be the reason why India is still a developing country and not a developed country. Shouldn’t the parties and festivals be a break from work rather than a regular activity? Or at least shouldn’t one respect the other people’s choice of a life without the disturbance of noise pollution? If people continue allocating more resources for such things rather than contributing in their own field of work / allowing others to contribute in their respective fields, I feel our journey towards the status of a developed nation is going to be very slow – just like the amazingly enjoyable processions we so often come across!

Time

I don’t know exactly when and how Pink Floyd grew onto me. I just knew them as a very successful rock band, well-known for the innovative sounds that appear in their songs. It took me a while to get to know the songs like Comfortably Numb, Marooned, Another Brick In The Wall etc. I had always read that their work is marked by the use of philosophical lyrics, but never really felt it as being so hard-hitting until I heard the songs Comfortably Numb and Time in a proper way.

Agreed, these two songs do tend towards expressing depressing sorts of feelings. But if you come to think of it, don’t most of us feel like that some or the other time? For the record, I do like to think that the glass is half full rather than half empty, but there are some moments in life when you do tend to introspect and realize the sad undercurrents in our lives.

(For those who haven’t heard the song Time yet, here are its rough lyrics. Reading it along with the song should give you a better impact, I think. The way Pink Floyd have composed a combination of hard-hitting notes (1^st & 3^rd stanza) and the feeling-rich sound (2^nd and 4^th stanza) is truly remarkable.)

Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day

Fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way

Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town

Waiting for someone or something to show you the way

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain

You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today

And then one day you find ten years have got behind you

No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking

Racing around to come up behind you again

The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older

Shorter of breath and one day closer to death

Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time

Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines

Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way

The time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say

How brutally real is that! I can even identify myself with that to some extent. When I was younger, may be in late school years, I so strongly thought that life is really a pretty long journey. Those cool days at school, playing with friends in the evenings, lazy Saturdays, fun Sundays, occasional picnics, annual exams, results, the small wanna-be-grown-up sort of celebration parties...School days were passing happily…

Better things were yet to come though. Soon the college started. Felt like the entire world had opened up for me. So many new ideas, inspirations, anxieties, what not… Sounds bookish now, but yeah, that time one does feel all these emotions in one go. You can’t wait to enter and live the college life that is ever so romantically described in books & films. You can’t wait to bunk your first lecture and go for a movie with your friends. You can’t wait to catch attention of a pretty girl and have a nice little conversation with her while walking around in college campus. You can’t wait to dress fashionably and dance in the college festivals. You can’t wait to grab every opportunity that may take you one step closer to a successful career. You feel like the king of the world who has finally arrived at the scene just to take the matter in his own hands.

I still can’t forget those lazy monsoon afternoons that accompanied the beginning of every academic year. Every year came and went with its fair share of successes and failures. Yet, the monsoons always felt like some kind of a reassurance. While hanging around in the campus, wandering aimlessly in the city, practicing music with your friends, it always felt that there is still more to come. Felt like there is still time to take that biiig step of becoming a grown-up.

Zip!!!

Suddenly one day you realize that actually ten years have got behind you. Your college is already finished about 5 years ago. You are no more a promising 16 year old college-entering teenager. You are a 26 year old grown-up (well, physically) with a baggage of some missed opportunities. You find yourself suddenly in the middle of a crazy battlefield where everybody is hammering you with issues like educational qualifications, career growth, jobs, hobbies, passions, physical/mental well-being, relationships, long term financial planning - even to the extent of it being for your children (which you haven’t even thought about yet!) and guess what, your eventual retirement!

If you think objectively, yes, the sun is the same. But now there doesn’t seem to be any opportunity to take a small time-out and take a fresh breath. You may have taken good steps to productively use your time so far, you may not have actually missed the starting gun. But back then as a kid, your entire sphere of life was very small. Now that you are exposed to so many diverse (which sometimes include depressing) aspects of life, it indeed feels like having missed the gun and everything just slipping away at insanely high speed like the sand in a closed fist. What is worse, that you don’t even have the choice to go away from all this, at least in 99% of the cases, because by now you have already become a part of the system where you have subconsciously accepted your fate.

Take a look at these lines from Comfortably Numb:

When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,

Out of the corner of my eye.

I turned to look but it was gone.

I cannot put my finger on it now.

The child is grown, the dream is gone.

I have become comfortably numb.

You can’t help but feel that all those dreams (that you thought you would achieve no matter what) have so systematically started fading away. (It is also possible, that you no longer want to pursue those dreams after realizing the harsh realities surrounding you.)

Yes, it does bring me to the feeling of disillusionment that I sometimes feel. A mini-figure of Woody Allen quickly starts hovering above my head like a Hollywood-style American military chopper with all his philosophies about meaninglessness of life.

But during times like these, what I love to do is introspect. I start to think: Is it really entirely my fault that I am feeling this way? Ok, I may have delayed taking some decisions and some times may not have worked as hard as I should have. But then there were so many things that were out of my control too. Sure, it feels sad that those priceless days of college-life won’t ever come back again, but then, what I have actually gained out of those days isn’t too bad either.

John Lennon once said: Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans. So why not just respect that? Rather than worrying whether the world is going to end in 2012, why not just look forward to a nice Sunday lunch with your old buddies from college?

I think one really understands (rather should understand) the importance of balance in life in such times. Just like you need to see the negative side to keep your feet on the ground, you also need to see the glass half full, once again. No matter how painful the reality is, you should understand that there is no choice but to make peace with it and with yourself. (A lesson I learnt partly through Woody Allen’s film Deconstructing Harry.)Because at the end of the day, I do feel hell lot luckier than so many other people in this world who unfortunately can’t even afford to buy one square meal.

As clichéd as that sounds, but I really have started to enjoy the smaller things in life - like the company of my close ones, an occasional game of Gulli Cricket with the kids in the neighborhood, a sudden phone call to/from an old friend, observing a kitten that generally runs away from me as if I were some murderer but rather happily eats the food that I bring for it…

The point of saying all this is that there is actually no point in all this. It is in fact what my friend Anand Kothekar may refer to as routine non-sense. But it is surely refreshing (as ironic as that may sound) to visit these depressing aspects of your life once in a while to realize the brutal realities of life, but at the same time, also to know how lucky you still are and how much more you still can do with whatever that is still left with you.